Monday, May 7, 2012

Feed him when he cries

I think I've got this whole baby thing figured out.  I took care of him for two hours this morning.  He really seems to like me.  I fed him when he cried, walked him around the neighborhood between naps and feeding, gave him gas drops after burping him.  I think I've got it all figured out.  I don't see what the big deal is.  

There was a fire in the neighborhood, so we went and checked that out.  It was two doors down from the garden.  We were already out walking when it happened so we stood around watching the action.  Two generations of morons.  The firemen came and cut a hole though the roof of the house and then proceeded to drown everything from the roof down.  We have long suspected that there is something illicit going on in the house.  There have been many strange occurrences.  Things that defy easy explanation.  People losing their minds, marching up and down the streets half-naked, screaming nonsensically.  Full winter clothing in summer, dancing and singing up and down the streets at all hours of the night.  Screaming.  Televisions being thrown through second story lattice walls.  

Drugs.  We know this.  But we just don't know the specifics.  We're assuming the authorities will take this opportunity to figure things out.  We posited that it was a meth lab, but those end in explosions more often than fires.  To be more precise, any fire would quickly be followed by an explosion. 

Okay.  It's time for me to go back to sleep, if I can.  I slept terribly last night and feel unrested today.  I've run out of NyQuil and the neighborhood drug lab seems to have just been flooded.

This is how Rhys feels about it: