I have just discovered the most wonderful and effective coping mechanism and I would like to share it with all of you:
No matter how heinous my behavior becomes I simply tell people that I have accepted Jesus into my heart and am now prepared to live The Christian Life.
The Christians are happy for me and everybody else just leaves me alone. Because I have so few Christian friends they are easy to avoid. I might end up going to church here or there, but that no longer seems like punishment. It's what's known as a "content rich" environment.
Christ's love is truly a get-out-of-jail-free-card.
I'm set free.
Yesterday alone I accepted Christ into my heart three or four times.
I want to find a way to monetize this feeling.