Friday, September 20, 2013

Your Cthonic Objective

I don't understand how paychecks work. I mean, I do, but still they confound me. Paychecks in which I have worked more hours somehow magically provide less money. I'm told that the government will tax me more if I make more money, they wouldn't want an employer exploiting me, but still....

Yes, I am paid hourly. There are times when I greatly prefer it. It is simple: I work more, I make more. But that hasn't happened this time and it is far too early in the morning for me to do any comparative analysis of the previous paycheck and this one. I'm assuming this means that I will get more money back at the end of the year. The government is always looking out for me, or for me, or at me.

I have been working a lot lately, you see. That is supposed to convert into more money for me, not less. It is a rather simple arrangement and Marx described it pretty well. It is supposed to be a reasonably simple arrangement, one with agreed-upon terms. 

Okay, I took a look at it. I thought there might be something worth relaying there, something funny. It was actually quite simple: I made less money. There was a holiday day involved. So, even though the total "hours worked" were more I had worked more overtime the paycheck before. So, that settles that, I am lazy and and Labor Day has cheated me out of capital. Why don't they call it Capital Day?

It is a holiday to celebrate the social and economic advancement of American workers. It's now known as irony. 

I have many friends that work for a fixed salary. They seem to prefer this and sometimes I can understand why. They make more money than me. But they are forced into working more hours at times, against their wishes, with no extra compensation. I'm not mature enough for a relationship like that. I am still at the stage in life where work should directly equal compensation. I have yet to advance to the point where I can see things in a more yearly way. The "big" picture.

Enough about money, and work. The way to be happy about the situation is to do as little as possible for as much return as imaginable. It is my key to success. Lounge until someone offers you compensation to cease lounging, but always be prepared for success through lottery winnings.

Anthony Robbins taught me that. He is known as a self-help author and it is a title that certainly seems to apply. He is a motivated speaker. A living coach, of sorts. 

I wonder if he will make a career transition when he gets older and instruct people how to die with power and wealth. 

"When it comes to dying, setting goals is the only way to get there."

"If you don't like the way you're dying then you must change. Death is a choice. Make yours last."

"If you want to have the death that you want then you must first imagine it, then become it. Most people simply lack a clear death-goal."

"If you're serious about this, then enroll in my 10 month program 'Pull Yourself Together.'"

"If you enjoyed that one then try my extended death-seminar dvd set, 'True Mastery of Your Passing.'"

Fuck, I should do this for a living: teach people how to die with a few simple rules of self-empowerment. Just use good old fashioned christian values to guilt people into having better, happier deaths.

Tell them that if they want their deaths to last then they must be pro-active about them. 

You're not incapable. You just haven't decided on a clear goal. Only you can do this. 

My program is designed to help you form habits that will get you back on track.

I could give them focus, something to strive for, a way to give something back. I see people that are just lazy in death, too many really, just lying about, letting it happen. If you want a death that will bring you true inner-happiness then you must change your death habits, and then be prepared to follow through with them.

This is almost too easy. If anybody out there needs this then please reach out to me. I have a cassette package that I'd love to sell you. You sound as if you could really use it.

It's time!