Having a car is a dull burden, though preferable to not having one at all.
I went to the gym this morning, afterwards I tried to go home to start my day. Something… the car wouldn't start. Seemed like a dead battery. The jumper cables I had bought were lost in a recent car exchange. So, a trip to the store for a new set, a quick jump when I got back, and now a mystery problem awaits me, parked out front.
I have no idea if the car will start when I go back outside at lunch. A lunch break that will be occupied with getting a new battery, I guess, unless they tell me it's the alternator, or something even more expensive.
The flux capacitor.
The car stalled on the drive home from Yosemite. It was driving along normally and then it started stalling. That's the way it goes, I guess. Things work, then they don't.
It's starting to feel like a struggling relationship. I don't know if I can count on it, don't know if it will last - or if it does, how long. Once hope in the future is gone then affection becomes an effort, or it evaporates altogether, a subtle meanness emerges, a stuttering of sympathies, and then voila!… you are on your own... standing by the side of the road with a one ton obligation, feeling like a fool; pushing it uphill is not an option, and love is useless; wondering what next, good god, what next?