Life is confusing. The more I try to clarify, the more confusion I seem to create.
Never defend yourself, especially if you haven't done anything wrong. It will only make you appear guilty. When you defend yourself you automatically appear defensive.
As I get older I have less and less time and patience to maintain personal relationships. It saddens me because the relationships that I do have I tend to value more, as time passes. Some of them.
I once read that most people form their significant relationships before the age of 30, very few form significant relationships after that age. That hasn't been true for me and I can count several close friendships that were formed after the age of 30, but perhaps I am a late bloomer.
But lately I do notice that I have less patience for what it takes to maintain relationships. It's not that I don't care about them, it's just that I've become less tolerant of certain things. I have always been a somewhat emotionally needy person, so I tend to be more tolerant of those who are similar. But as I become less and less needy in that way I have also lost some of my patience for those people.
Time becomes a strange thing, so much more transitory and less fixed, though perpetually moving towards complete and total stasis.
What do I know?