I took a morning walk down from Nob Hill to Geary, Starbucks. On the way I took a wrong turn and ended up in a neighborhood that I used to often visit. My friend, Jennifer, lived there for several years and I would stay at her house while here. One day there I watched Vertigo five times, accomplishing the intended effect. I could not walk without dizziness for days. It was the only dvd I had, television was and is abysmal. I was in the mood for it, I guess. I did not learn the lessons of the film, though. We never do. Maybe they are too vague. It is the fault of the lesson.
No, that can't be right.
We just rush in, assuming something close to love will somehow fix it. Dreamers all, blinded by emotion, reminded by reason.
As I walked along Geary I was also reminded of an old friend, departed, the rambunctious and directionless fun that we used to have. The vestiges of a time. I would write about it, but it would only be to distract myself, which would be unfair to the subject.
On the walk back it is all uphill, a steep one. The Nob, it is a nice neighborhood, where I would wish to live if I move into the city. Though it is well out of my price range. Everything is. I can not even afford staying here for free, there is parking and the cost of coffee to consider. Already well past my budget, which is currently nil.
As I walked I started shedding shirts and the little Winnie-the-Pooh hat that another friend let me borrow, to keep me from the cold. I arrived back at the apartment I'm watching (again) sweating through the one remaining shirt I had left on.
Now, I sit here and face the change in temperature, both earthly and bodily. It is good practice, change.
I wait for the rest of the world to start up, to hear the machination of a city come to life. Today, I will go with my friend and we will visit the free art galleries. I gazed through the front glass of a photography store on my walk where there were pictures taken of rock stars selling for hundreds, even thousands, of dollars.
Impossible. I'll probably return there later to verify, and chuckle to myself.
To post this piece to my site I will lie down on my stomach in the carpet hallway, to get a wi-fi signal from his apartment. It feels silly, posting these ramblings, but it is still somehow better than keeping quiet about it all.