I should stop eating pot edibles before I update here. It is not resulting in much that is coherent. I detest most potheads, for reasons I shouldn't have to explain. It's the way they talk and think that bothers me most, as if the values of life can and should be mutually agreed upon by dopey, knowing smiles. It's not just that. It's as if the issues have been settled long in advance and the vacant smile is designed to communicate and gently share that fact. Potheads, on some level, believe deeply in the likelihood of UFOs. Ask them, they'll explain it.
Ok, I should not write about my dislike of most potheads, either. I did not intend to come in here and cause turmoil. I'm a very kind of soul.
This weekend is a possible ski/snowboarding trip. Everything is set to go, except I have been feeling lately like I might want more time to myself. It is not only that I want or need more time to myself. There is more. Relationship strains.
Something happened last year. I grew older. I stopped drinking for six months and had the horrible realization that life doesn't necessarily get any better by the absence of alcohol. I mean, it does get better in some ways, but there are a number of things that you realize are not improved at all. I was forced to acknowledge that some problems are not even touched by alcohol. They are parallel issues more than serial. It was so disappointing I went back to drinking.
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Sorry for the post in two parts - I became distracted. Another thing I dislike about potheads.
I'm upstairs with the dog locked in a bedroom while a homeowner's association meeting goes on downstairs. Something is coming to order. I'm sure of it.
I have just chosen the dates for a summer camping trip (mostly camping) that the boy and I will take in mid June to early July - King's Canyon (sites open sometime in May), through the Mojave Desert (just passing through), Vegas (Father's Day), Grand Canyon (Southern rim, site booked), Monument Valley (probably just driving through), Arches (no campsites available), Canyonlands ("first come; first served"), Bryce Canyon (site booked), Zion (working on it...), Vegas again (maybe staying with friends), Yosemite (more sites open on Feb 15th), and then home to Sonoma. It feels as if I have a tentative plan.
R came in while I was looking at the dates and asked mildly snidely if I was going to "make any reservations, or just wing it..." The idea of meandering aimlessly terrifies her. If she could fax me an itinerary in her sleep right now she would. We are very different people. Sometimes I don't see that until I do something the way that I prefer.
I tried and failed to use the recreation.gov site. It was dispiriting to see the NPS site be so poorly maintained, to the point of inoperability. The site kept crashing, freezing, losing my auth, I kept having to delete the cookie the site planted because it couldn't seem to interact with it well or for very long, nearly perpetual 403s (which wasn't even the correct HTTP response, because I wasn't accessing a page that would have a permissions' set).
The once great National Park Service, humbled by incompetent 3rd party tech contractors.
I was only able to book two of the campsites. The rest either are not available yet or the site inexplicably stated that they would release open sites on Feb. 6th 2024 (exactly one year from tonight), or they were already completely booked all the way through the summer.
I think CS has a friend that knows how best to do Yosemite without a camping reservation. Holy Shit... CS turns 100 yrs old in a couple days. I don't know Roman numerals but I think he's just C after that.
I need to remind myself to say something nice to the fledgling centenarian.
Well, that is my update for the day. You really shouldn't snoop through somebody's personal diary entries like this. You're bound to be either disarmed or disappointed.
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